Gwyneth Paltrow Occupation: Self-righteous twit
Baby talk, baby talk it's a wonder you can goop! La Gwynnie on wishing she was Cindy Brady's namesake...
"That's what I wanted to change my name to as a little kid. I hated Gwyneth back then. It sounded stuck up."
A stuck-up stick-in-the-organic-herbal-mud with a stick up her backside taking back the Gwyneth! Even in childhood she knew she couldn't aspire to be as groovy as Marcia or even Jan. The vicious cycle continues while somewhere Apple's out there wishing her name could be Winona or Scarlett.

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