Name: Madonna
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Forget Gwyneth! Madonna has some goop-y advice to fix your life:
"Dress like Britney Spears and think like me, and everything will be fine."
In other words, use a half percent of your brain and adorn yourself in an ensemble made entirely out of denim. All will be well.
comments:
Name: Madonna
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Taking a stand for marginalized celebrities everywhere!
"[Tom Cruise] is a good person. I think he gets a raw deal, just as I think the orphans in Malawi get a raw deal; just as I think a lot of marginalised people get a raw deal."
"Must somehow figure out how to connect multi-millionaire celeb's 'problems' with starving children's real problems...ooh! I'll use the word marginalized and that will make all the difference."
Name: Madonna
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Just in case you were wondering how the human rights violations on the African continent relate to Britney Spears:
"When you think about the way people treat each other in Africa, about witchcraft and people inflicting cruelty and pain on each other, then come back here and, you know, people taking pictures of people when they're in their homes, being taken to hospitals, or suffering, and selling them, getting energy from them, that's a terrible infliction of cruelty."
Late onset of pop diva senility? A little late on that bandwagon aren't you Madge? Mariah had you beat by years! I remember when you were an innovator and not a follower...
Name: Madonna
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Madonna touts her political science Ph.D. with the following:
"I don’t know what our government does except put us into debt and blow up other countries."
Cor blimey, govna! Even in a fake British accent, it doesn't sound any smarter.
Name: Madonna
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Bemoaning the present state of literature, Madge is at her most eloquent:
"I'm starting to read to my son, but I couldn't believe how vapid and vacant and empty all the stories were. There's, like, no lessons.... There's, like, no books about anything."
"So that's, like, why I had to so totally write books myself. I mean, my gawd! Where did all the, like y'know, books go dude? This is sooo bumming me out. Totally. Thank Kabbalah I, like, know how to, y'know, write and all. Cuz like, what would books do without me? They'd be, like, not there. Seriously."
Name: Madonna
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Just like any other geriatric spandex wearer talking to herself in the park feeding pidgeons:
"Listen, everyone is entitled to my opinion."
Ooh, thanks, but I'll pass.
Name: Madonna
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
To be filed under fake English accents and grand psychiatric delusions:
"I want to be like Gandhi and Martin Luther King and John Lennon - but I want to stay alive."
The alive part is what kills the dream for me.
Name: Madonna
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Occupation: Jim Jones in Training
Detailing her reasons to, as London's Sunday Times put it: "lobbying the government and nuclear industry over a scheme to clean up radioactive waste with a supposedly magic Kabbalah fluid", Desperately Seeking Sanity blurted this gem:
"I can write the greatest songs and make the most fabulous films and be a fashion icon and conquer the world, but if there isn't a world to conquer, what's the point?"
Actually, it's quite genius to say that you CAN create the best works of art in the world, but won't as long as nuclear power is in use. That way you never have to pony up the talent.